Friday, March 30, 2012

The Joan of Arc of poultry

"During this time, I told a shocked R.E. class that I would give up my life for the cause of chickens. I suppose I considered myself to be the Joan of Arc of poultry. Whilst I no longer lecture people about our feathery friends, I still stand up for them. There is no excuse to still be buying produce from caged hens."
(Dec. 1, 2011, The Silly Asparagus)

Thursday, March 29, 2012

The Reese Witherspoon of baked goods

"Since I am clearly obsessed with the topic tonight (diet induced psychosis) and a self- proclaimed trendspotter, I will go ahead and speculate as to another up and comer: The Lemon Square. Cool, fresh, stylish, a bit retro and understated, the Reese Witherspoon of baked goods…I think they have a future. I rarely bake but I made an exception on Easter Sunday and made a batch using a recipe I found online, screwing it up and then fixing it enough to come out pretty good. I know I took a pic on my phone- they looked so pretty on an all white, rectangular dish…but I seem to have erased it. Trust me, they were cute."
(April 26, 2011, Cowbells and Dreams)

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

The Jason Biggs of basketball

"The contrast between Bowie’s career and the two greats that sandwich him could not be starker. He was the John and Jeremy Ryan crashing the Chang family wedding. He will always be the Jason Biggs of basketball; known not for basketball or acting skill, but for being that one"
(May 21, 2011, Locker Pulse)

Tuesday, March 27, 2012

The Channing Tatum of brunch

"Ladies and gents, I think I’ve found the Channing Tatum of brunch. BLD sits there on a quiet corner in the financial district. Quietly. Looking all smug and chic with its cushy dark booths, its funky light fixtures, its sleek bar. It sits there, offering up cheap lunches to the workers who dwell in the office building above. Little do they know of the wonders that are inside."
(Feb. 27, 2012, EatDrinkToronto)

Monday, March 26, 2012

The Hulk Hogan of western thought

"Plato. The man,..whooo! If Socrates is the Vince McMahon, then Plato is the Hulk Hogan of western thought! Plato's relationship to Socrates was that he was Socrates's student and it is alleged, one of the youths that Socrates corrupted."
(Dec. 10, 2011, Confessions of a Thirty Something Cybertronian)

Friday, March 23, 2012

The Yosemite Sam of nutrition research

"Here’s the thing: this bill was written at a time when a good, nutritious meal was ‘meat and potatoes’. Thanks in large part to Walter Willett, furthest left in the picture above, the Yosemite Sam of nutrition research at HSPH (he shoots holes in lots of government-funded nutrition information – plus that mustache!), we now know more about what constitutes healthy eating."
(Oct. 26, 2011, greenapothecary)

Thursday, March 22, 2012

The Laurence Olivier of sarcastic twerps with inflated egos and few lines

"He’s the Laurence Olivier of sarcastic twerps with inflated egos and few lines."
(March 21, 2012, Jason Zinoman, The New York Times)

The Amanda Seyfried of mascots

"This is the second time we've had the Texans this year, so it's the second appearance of the blue bull, Toro. And I stand by my previous statement that he's... alright. I find myself indifferent to his looks. Making him like the Amanda Seyfried of mascots."
(Dec. 10, 2011, 11 Points)

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

The Tony Soprano of squirrels

"The table is strewn with corn kernels and one squirrel, my friend JoAnn said he was the Tony Soprano of squirrels, is eating and lording it over the table. He won’t allow anybody to eat with him."
(Jan. 25, 2012, Leslee Clapp)

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

The Peyton Manning of hot women

"I thought about doing the standard 'all the hot gals of the Oscars red carpet' post, but...I don't know. There were a few surprising showings (Ellie Kemper, who I'll get to in a later post, and Viola Davis' tasty treats are the first two to come to my bourbon-saddled mind), as well as some comical ones (I mean, Angelina...I wouldn't say 'No' to her, but anymore she's the Peyton Manning of hot women: A big name with a Hall-of-Fame career, who at this point is damaged goods and a bit past her prime; she can still win a few games, but there's no way you'd stake your future on her—sorry Brad)."
(Feb. 28, 2012, Crooked Straight)

Monday, March 19, 2012

The Beelzebub of the food world

"I have always believed that sugar is the 'Beelzebub' of the food world. In my years of working with women, those who were addicted to sugar, were the ones with the most health problems while struggling with their weight."
(Jan. 15, 2012,

Friday, March 16, 2012

The Amanda Peet of edible-skin fruit

"4. The Peach. Its fuzziness is reassuring. Its color is pretty. The peach is solid - the Amanda Peet of edible-skin fruit."
(May 13, 2005, Blueprint Blue)

Thursday, March 15, 2012

The Gwen Stefani of bakeries

"Yes, I know I just wrote about cupcakes. But that was before I walked by Sweet Revenge, which could be described as the Gwen Stefani of bakeries."
(Dec. 31, 2010, Salli Vates' NY Food Page)

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

The Jackie Treehorn of the Mideast

"That makes Sharon the Jackie Treehorn of the Mideast..."
(April 24, 2009, Dohiyi Mir)

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

The Drew Barrymore of golf

"Tiger is just another child star with problems. He’s the Drew Barrymore of golf. He even followed the time-honored Hollywood formula and ended up in rehab after his fall from grace, even if it was libido rehab. He’s a prodigy that has revealed that he’s a self-involved, self-important rich guy that cheated on his wife. Frankly, though, I’m a little relieved to find out the guy is actually human, even if it is by being a despicable person to his family."
(April 2, 2010, Our First 100)

Monday, March 12, 2012

The Dick Cheney of chocolate

"Carob tastes completely different from chocolate and doesn’t have the same feel-good chemicals. I’m not saying carob is the Dick Cheney of chocolate. But taken on its own merit, which nobody does, carob is marvelous and intriguing, with a personality of its own."
(Oct. 21, 2011,

Friday, March 9, 2012

The Mr. Spock of genitalia

"For instance, if guys think with their dicks, then those private parts are often very logical. They are the Mr. Spock of genitalia. Guys tend to also think rationally, and when they don't, it is still goal oriented. Just like in sex, the thinking is often brute force, penetrating, and blunt ... everything tends to be out in the open, just like the genitals."(March 29, 2011, Dee-lusions of Grandeur)

Thursday, March 8, 2012

The Nicolas Cage of the NFL

"The Chargers have been in San Diego since 1961, and in that time they've established themselves as the Nicolas Cage of the NFL: Every 10 years they seem to pull it together and have a decent showing, but mostly they're just embarrassing to watch."
(March 7, 2012, Justin Halpern, Grantland)

The Rosa Parks of sofas

"The day before she died, I awoke to find Mangia sitting on our new couch, which was universally understood as a no-pet zone. Since she was fairly arthritic, I wondered how she even got up there. Assigning her the role of the Rosa Parks of sofas, my two dogs and other cat followed her lead, piling on in an act of group defiance."
(Feb. 21, 2012, Mary K. Moore, Huffington Post)

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

The Jeremy Lin of depressed people

"I'm loving this guy. He is like the Jeremy Lin of depressed people. He just got so depressed he went and sat in his car for two months. Incredible achievement, it inspires me. I would sit there about two hours, then come back and get a sandwich or check the latest non-News on BI . I'm depressed, my life is miserable, but I just couldn't stay in that car for more than a few hours. The dude is brilliant. What was it like, just sitting there, day after day, no iPhone no Call of Duty no nothing? What was he thinking for all those hours. I want to see the movie based on this! When is it coming out?"
(Feb. 21, 2012, Business Insider)

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

The Lena Dunham of beef jerky commercials

"Cathy is the Lena Dunham of beef jerky commercials. "
(March 6, 2012, James Wolcott, Twitter)

The Mary Magdalene of The Dude

"The origin of the name Maude is ‘Woman from Magdala.’ Yes, the same place where Mary Magdalene was from. Another derivation of Maude is ‘Matilda,’ which means ‘mighty in battle.’ Maude will assume the image of Matilda in the ‘Condition’ dream sequence. So now, we’ve established that Maude is the Mary Magdalene of The Dude. What’s really strange is that Moore and Bridges will appear again in 2013 in ‘The Seventh Son’ a mystical thriller about sorcery. Bridges will play ‘Master Gregory’ and Moore, ‘Mother Malkin.’ Hmmmmmmm."
(Dec. 5, 2011, Robert Phoenix, Astro Dispatch)

Monday, March 5, 2012

The LeBron James of modern church life

"A few years ago I got invited to have a meeting with Andy Stanley and a few other folks from NorthPointCommunityChurch. (If Rick Warren is the Lebron James of modern church life, then Andy Stanley is the Kevin Garnett. Team player, skilled beyond his years and able to rock the pulpit like few other people on the planet.)"
(Feb. 23, 2012, Ohio Ministry Assistants)

Friday, March 2, 2012

The Michael Ian Black of chefs

"I lost interest in the last cycle of 'Top Chef Masters,' and now with a new format and a new host, I’m not sure if I won’t lose interest again, particularly after they voted off one of the three chefs (in addition to the two Indian guys) that I had much invested in as personalities. I don’t remember the name of the guy voted off, but he was like the Michael Ian Black of chefs."
(April 11, 2011, Dustin Rowles, Pajiba)

Thursday, March 1, 2012

The Ozzy of small-time Iowa blues

"I hope I don't throw John off by changing the arrangement IN THE MIDDLE OF THE SONG as I have been (more and more) prone to do. (yes, I have become the Ozzy of small-time Iowa blues) We'll have some Christmas giveaways and some merch specials to help with stocking stuffers (Stuff 'er? YOU stuff 'er, you brought 'er) (was that naughty or nice?) all this and it's GEEEZER gig hours too, 6-9:30-ish. You bring the CAKE and the mistletoe..."
(Dec. 11, 2011, Blues Historian)