Thursday, May 31, 2012

The Jack Kirby of Miami Vice

"Mann's name is the one most attached with Miami Vice, and unfairly so.  Anthony Yerkovich is the Jack Kirby of Miami Vice.  I was glad that when Mann made the feature film, he made a point of Yerkovich being the creator."
(Feb. 6, 2011, Chud)

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

The David Hasselhoff of comedians

"Seemingly more popular in other countries than my own, I've come to the sad realization that I'm the David Hasselhoff of comedians."
(May 30, 2012, Shari Vanderwerf, Twitter)

The Louis C.K. of child-related jokes to waiters

"First of all, small children are just mini Kardashian family members; all they do is eat, cry, and demand things.  So if you’ve brought one of them to the restaurant, chances are they’ve made the waiter’s life significantly shittier for the forty minutes you’re there.  So even if you were to be the Louis C.K. of child-related jokes to waiters, the waiter wouldn’t laugh because he or she wants to physically hurl your baby across the room like a sack of flour."
(March 27, 2012, Justin Halpern, These Fries are Good)

Tuesday, May 29, 2012

The Brick Tamland of the Obama administration

"I like to think of him as the Brick Tamland of the Obama administration. Not a bad guy. Just … 'special.'"
(March 30. 2012, Hot Air)

Monday, May 28, 2012

The Gregory House of the cartoon world

"Daffy Duck, well that lad must be on vicadin, why else would he have that gruff demeanour, and prone to outbursts of pure insanity. Daffy Duck, the Gregory House of the cartoon world! Foghorn Leghorn obviously has a crack pipe hidden amongst that feathery body of his and well, Yosemiti Sam. That geezers on meth. Simples."
(Jan. 22, 2012, Rob Draugr)

Friday, May 25, 2012

The Michael Jordan of disease-causing food additives

"Red Dye #40 debilitates the immune system -I  believe it’s the Michael Jordan of disease-causing  food additives."
(April 25, 2012, Angela M.D.)

Thursday, May 24, 2012

The Parker Posey of apartment spaces

"Much has been said about glossy white or black floors--but how about using a bright color? This orange is almost retina-searing; but for this loft space, it seems to fit. As a friend observed recently, 'Lofts just seem to get away with so much more! They're like the Parker Posey of apartment spaces.' What do you think of this bright resin floor?"
(Sept. 24, 2008, Grace Shu, Apartment Therapy)

Wednesday, May 23, 2012

The Pau Gasol of rap

"Drake is the Pau Gasol of rap. So talented but so soft."
(July 31, 2011, DJ Booth)

Tuesday, May 22, 2012

The Mick Jagger of scented candles

"The Mick Jagger Of Scented Candles
Frédéric Malle has been crafting coveted perfumes and fragrances for years, but until now, had never done a candle. Why? The answer is simple: “Most candles are designed to cover bad smells, but my clients don’t have bad-smelling houses,” he said. Not these. Malle applied the same discerning nose to his votives that he did to his eaux, and the result is a line of candles unlike most others on the market. “It took me ten years to do a candle, and we are giving access to fragrances that no one else would do,” Malle explained."
(Oct. 1, 2010, Victoria Namkung, Style)

Monday, May 21, 2012

The Wilt Chamberlain of exorcisms

"Also, how about the good Reverend racking up 15,000 demons expelled?  He is literally the Wilt Chamberlain of exorcisms.  I also love the TV friendly price of $9.95 for the Demonic Posession Online Test, simply to cover administrative feels.  You know what?  There are administrative fees for running this blog, so if everyone could send me $9.95, that would be great."
(Feb. 29, 2012, The Takeover)

Friday, May 18, 2012

The Seth Rogen of bread

"In the meantime, I have the Seth Rogen of bread–ugly but loveable."
(June 6, 2011, Mark Stenberg)

Thursday, May 17, 2012

The Erin Brockovich of chickens

"Congratulations!!! You are the Erin Brockovich of Chickens!!!"
(July 5, 2011, Cloth Diapering Mama)

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

The Roddy Piper of traditional country music

"Miss Leslie is the Roddy Piper of traditional country music when it comes to defending what she believes in! She’s here to kick ass and chew bubble gum, and she’s all out of bubble gum! (lol) Go Miss Leslie!"
(June 19, 2009, The 9512 Country Music)

Tuesday, May 15, 2012

The Neve Campbell of confusing references

"I'm the Neve Campbell of confusing references."
(May 15, 2012, Jen Statsky, Twitter)

The Urkel of funny words

"'Kumquat' is the Urkel of funny words."
(March 15, 2012, Michael Ian Black, Twitter)

The Conan O'Brien of squash

"Now to the butternut squash. For those of you who don't know, this is what a butternut squash looks like. It is the coolest of the squash family because it has the funniest name. It is like the Conan O'Brien of squash: slightly orange and unattractive, but funny and tasty so people love him it anyway."
(Jan. 24, 2011, The Accidental Lawyer)

Monday, May 14, 2012

The Michelle Pfeiffer of bears

"Yeah, yeah. And I'll tell you something, if Saturn was a female human, I can just see how beautiful she is as a bear - I've always called her the Michelle Pfeiffer of bears out here."
(Dec. 14, 2011, I Bought a Ticket to the World)

Friday, May 11, 2012

The Kobe Bryant of cake decorating

"But note to self: Never, ever, and I mean EVER try to cut two layers into four layers, ever, ever again. I mean really, who did I think I was? Rosie of Sweetapolita, the Kobe Bryant of cake decorating? Tsk, tsk. That is so not me. I have zero decorating skills, zero patience and I am an overall mess of a baker. Keep that in mind next time, Geni, Okey dokey?"
(April 2, 2012, Sweet and Crumby)

Thursday, May 10, 2012

The Soup Nazi of Bachelorettes

"I’m surprised Ashley kept Ames, actually, since he admitted he’d been an unpopular kid up until he was sixteen. Usually if anyone admits any earlier sadness, weakness, or depth of character to this horrible woman, she drops them like a hot potato. She’s kind of like the 'Soup Nazi' of Bachelorettes; as long as you stand in line and spout driveling insincere cliches at her, you’re fine, but say anything with any substance whatsoever and she cancels the cocktail party (again), and it’s 'no rose for you!'"
(July 12, 2011, TV Line)

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

The Judas of the food world

“I should not eat that sandwich. That sandwich has bread. Bread has carbs. Carbs are the Judas of the food world; They will surely betray me.”
(April 9, 2012, Tara Cronica)

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

The Wile E. Coyote of nicotine cessation

"Still, here we are, trying (again) to quit.  As usual, we've come up with a foolproof plan of our own devising that is guaranteed to backfire.  We're the Wile E. Coyote of nicotine cessation."
(Jan. 4, 2012, Unremitting Failure)

Monday, May 7, 2012

The Russ Meyer of the Rapture

"In Christianity Today, Dean A. Anderson looks back fondly on the 40th anniversary of Donald W. Thompson’s A Thief in the Night. He manages to do so, somehow, without ever mentioning Donald W. Thompson. Odd. (The Godfather came out 40 years ago yesterday — think anyone will do an article on that without ever mentioning Francis Ford Coppola?) Fortunately, Randall Balmer has already provided us with a terrific profile of the idiosyncratic auteur — the Russ Meyer of the Rapture — in Mine Eyes Have Seen the Glory: A Journey Into the Evangelical Subculture in America."
(March 16, 2012, Fred Clark, Patheos)

Sunday, May 6, 2012

The Michael Phelps of taking shits at Burger King

"I'm the Michael Phelps of taking shits at Burger King."
(May 6, 2012, Rob Delaney, Twitter)

Friday, May 4, 2012

The Ronald Reagan of wind-up robots

"This week we unveiled the game icon after taking your feedback on the poll both on Touch Arcade, FB and Google Plus. The results were a landslide for Laser. I guess you could call him the Ronald Reagan of wind up robots."
(Nov. 19, 2011, Som(a)niloquy)

Thursday, May 3, 2012

The Rosa Parks of the anti-anti-online privacy movement

"This kind of big brother stuff, sends my imagination off into the stratosphere. I picture the guy who asks my for my Facebook password wearing black gloves, a monocle, and sporting a wicked scar. When I picture myself refusing, I imagine being dragged kicking and screaming by two huge Men in Black. Then I’m incarcerated as a political dissident, and I become the Rosa Parks of the anti-anti-online privacy movement. It’s kind of cool, actually."
(March 23, 2012, Robert O'Brien, Baltimore Fishbowl)

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

The Khloe Kardashian of tennis majors

"Novak Djokovic arrived today, even with two Austrailian Open titles (the Khloe Kardashian of tennis majors) and only one loss this year he became a true champion with his win over Nadal in the Wimbleon finals."
(July 3, 2011, I'll Be Frank)

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

The Mark Twain of Kanye West jokes

"Click the jump for 'Born This Day' featuring Aziz Ansari, the Mark Twain of Kanye West jokes."
(Feb. 23, 2012, City Beat)