The Helen Gurley Brown of standup comedy

"I would describe Phyllis Diller as the Helen Gurley Brown of standup comedy if I was clear on what I actually meant. But she was hilarious,"
(Aug. 20, 2012, James Wolcott, Twitter)

The Mozart of wrapping a box

"The guy next to me at the post office is the Mozart of wrapping a box"
(Aug. 17, 2012, Leoni Fizzoli, Twitter)

The Gary Oldman of hockey players

"Belong to the same person??? Amazing. He's the Gary Oldman of hockey players."
(July 17, 2012, SB Nation)

The Sarah Palin of cities

"that is not a real city - Tampa - built on a sacred Native American burial ground - thus desecrating the original people's burial ground and bringing a curse upon this town.  I am sure no one at the RNC knows about this.  Tampa was not a good choice - kind of the Sarah Palin of cities - even the much heralded Tampa Trump Tower went bankrupt before they sold many of the spaces."
(July 24, 2012, Daily Kos)

The Dolph Lundgren of sac removals

"Man, he cut the zit out of that thing!!! I was a bit disappointed though, I was under the impression that there would be cheese removal followed by the sac attack. Regardless, this dude is the Dolph Lundgren of sac removals….One bad mamma jamma."
(Feb. 2, 2011, PopThatZit)

The Lord Voldemort of policy questions

"So it hardly matters that Kathleen Sebelius, the secretary of health and human services, is widely seen as quietly capable; she was not front and center in Obama’s public push for health-care reform, a topic that another former senior administration aide now calls the Lord Voldemort of policy questions, the issue that must not be named."
(July 2012, Todd S. Purdum, Vanity Fair)

The Mitch Hedberg of dinosaurs

"Velociraptor: the Mitch Hedberg of dinosaurs."
(June 13, 2012, List of the Day)

The Bradley Cooper of sleep technologists

"I don't read trade papers or ongoing studies about sleep, I don't go to sleep medicine conferences (Yeah, that's a thing. Sounds exciting doesn't it?) and I don't go out of my way to find out about new methodologies and/or ways of thinking in the field. I just kind of go with the flow, altering my own methods only slightly according to what I'm told to do. I am the Bradley Cooper of sleep technologists: I do just enough to get by never anything more but I should be the Christian Bale of sleep technologists: super method and willing to scream at and belittle those I deem my lessors."
(Feb. 16, 2012, Run from Fire)

The Cookie Monster of IT security

"Following a few simple steps will show your peers you really do care and you are not the cookie monster of IT security spend by showing value. Your vendors will also like and respect you too. Remember, their time is as precious as yours."
(May 7, 2012, nOObpentesting.com)

The Clint Eastwood of park dudes

"Seaweed...make my day. This guy is the clint eastwood of park dudes."
(July 12, 2012, The Topeka Capital-Journal)

The Dr. Doom of girlfriends

"Brandonman: Hence, why you are the Dr. Doom of girlfriends. Dump her already, dude. She’s a villain!"
(Feb. 9, 2012, Brandonman)

The Stevie Nicks of gluten-free food

"Looking at Martha’s website makes me wonder what I should do with my website and blog.  I blog about food but am hesitant to share recipes, especially for stuff in the bakery and online store.  Very territorial about my flour blends.  Sometimes I check out the Gluten-Free Goddess blog.   If Martha is the Barbra Streisand of food, then Karina, the self-proclaimed Gluten-Free Goddess is the Stevie Nicks of gluten-free food.  Flowy, artsy, all moonbeams, starfish and shit."
(Oct. 17, 2011, Shelby's Kitchen Therapy)

The Lady Macbeth of the Mexican drug world

"As if receiving charges of electric current at regular intervals, Travolta is manic and most amusing as the government agent forced into ethical and practical contortions to stay afloat; Del Toro entertainingly showboats while demonstrating dozens of ways to convey diabolical menace; and Hayek synthesizes ultimate elegance, motherly concern and complete ruthlessness as the Lady Macbeth of the Mexican drug world."
(June 28, 2012, Todd McCarthy, The Hollywood Reporter)

The Jesus of letting people into my lane in construction zones

"I'm the Jesus of letting people into my lane in construction zones"
(Aug 2, 2012, @LaBaPete, Twitter)

The Ted Bundy of work pass maintenance

"It is true. I am the Ted Bundy of work pass maintenance. In my working life I have murdered dozens of them.  They have been abandoned in cabs, bars, washing machines, dryers, trains, boyfriends, buses, lift wells, bins ….. a gentleman once returned one after finding it wedged in his windscreen wipers.  (who knows…). Sadly most passes have not been as lucky, lost forever quite likely on the Bankstown line or at the bottom of my work’s lift well."
(May 31, 2012, The Lazy Civil Servant)

The Jack Handey of Christian culture

"John Piper is the Jack Handey of Christian culture."
(May 10, 2012, The Wartburg Watch of 2012)