The Conan the Barbarian of French fries

"The Anvil is the Conan the Barbarian of French fries. Its Thick, dangerous, intense and brings about the lamentations of the women. Preparing to eat this requires war planning."
(Feb. 2, 2011, Burger Contest)

The Jesse Pinkman of cats

"This guy is like the Jesse Pinkman of cats."
(Aug. 19, 2011, I'll Be Waiting)

The John Cusack of however the world ends

"It's hard not to get a kick out of the apocalypse. I don't mean the real apocalypse, whatever that may be. I hold out little hope that I will be the John Cusack of however the world ends, steering limousines and aircraft away from cities as they collapse into the earth. No, I'll probably be one of those background figures who you see for an instant, tumbling through the air. You'll know which one is me — I'll be snapping photos with my iPad on my way down."
(April 28, 2011, Max Sparber, MinnPost)

The Marvin the Martian of Roman governors

"I feel sorry for Pilate. He was the kind of guy who just kept screwing up. He was, in effect, the Marvin the Martian of Roman governors, his delusions of power and grandeur constantly blowing up in his face."
(April 21, 2011, Joshua Smith, Everyday Revolutionary)

The Don Cheadle of friends

"I can't carry a conversation to save my life..I'm like the Don Cheadle of friends. I can't really carry a movie on my own, but I'm a hell of a scene stealer."
(Aug. 18, 2006, Synchronicity)

The Charles Xavier of football chants

"We have all become accustomed to the now world-known 'P*ta,' that makes its appearance every time the opposing goalkeeper parts ways with the ball during the game. El Fua is the P*ta's Kryptonite, what Batman is to the Joker, the Charles Xavier of football chants; all Superhero metaphors aside, it is the counterpart to the p*ta chant that some tend to love and others hate."
(July 12, 2011, Edgar Alvarez, FMF State of Mind)

The Tyra Banks of the hamster family

"Though i must say that rat is one animal that i can not stand, but this hamster (which im still having trouble not to categorize it in my enemy list) just so cute with its high-fashion pose.Literally, this hamster was a hearthrob, as whenever i click the camera button, he always stop for pose. Its like the Tyra Banks of the hamster family."
(Feb. 12, 2011, Fast and Furious)

The Darth Maul of penis lightsabers

"I just hope, that some day, I can be the Darth Maul of penis lightsabers."
(June 24, 2011, "Putting on a Glow in the Dark Condom and Calling Yourself a Jedi Knight," Facebook)

The Alec Baldwin of brownies

"A revelation! These brownies are getting better with age. They are the Alec Baldwin of brownies."
(July 18, 2011, Stella Newman's Brownies)

The Brian Eno of healthy breakfast burritos

"I'm the Brian Eno of healthy breakfast burritos."
(Aug 20, 2011, Dan Cronin, Twitter)

The Captain Kirk of inebriation

"Indulging in a ginger julep or one of their carefully selected craft drafts in one of these babies, like the Captain Kirk of inebriation, will get you through the evening."
(Nov. 30, 2010, The Loop Scoop)

The Yo-Yo Ma of the rest of lunch

"Next, we trekked to a ger camp for lunch. The beef, salad, rice, and fries were hands down the best food we have had yet - a delectable symphony of flavors, each note playing softly on all the right taste buds. The classic milk tea accompanied the meal, and tasted like warm milk with a sprinkling of extra salty sweat (the Ke$ha to the Yo-Yo Ma of the rest of lunch)."
(June 5, 2011, Pages From My Passport)

The Peter Pan of Australian student politics

"The very dream of the uni student political activist. He can be a ratbag for as long as he can keep the dollars flowing in. In other words, he is the Peter Pan of Australian student politics."
(May 20, 2011, Catallaxy Files)

The Cee Lo of the Gospel

"Thanks for responding. I understand, yet my original question Who determines what is profanity?! I have read an acronym once for where the f word originated from. I won’t post it because I respect this man of God (Pastor Lewis) page. However, if the acronym is true, then somewhere along the line it was perverted. Please understand I am not defending the speaker by any means. I just think at times we are quick to call things evil , profane, worldly without truly taking a look at it. Honestly, he (the speaker) may not realize that he is wrong. BUT, if he is indeed attempting to be the CEE-LO of the Gospel, then yeah I think there is some carnality in his preaching. But, if he has good intentions and is truly attempting to reach the people, I get it. Just my opinion though."
(March 23, 2011, Welcome to Ex Times)

The Keith Richards of concrete floors

"This whole project was correction of construction errors, as the building was originally a laundromat, had probably half a dozen cold joints, plumbing trenches, and holes and was a generally haggard 50-some-year old slab. It was the Keith Richards of concrete floors. The worst part was a combination of slabs in the floor with about a 2" ridge. More on that later: let's start at the front door."
(May 5, 2011, Concrete Times)

The Rosa Parks of truck nuts

"The Rosa Parks of Truck Nuts"
(Aug. 9, 2011, Lary Wallace, The Faster Times)

The Matt Damon of muppets

"Grover, pfffft! He’s the Matt Damon of muppets. Kind of pretty but really really stupid."
(Oct. 12, 2010, Support Your Local Gunfighter)

The Will Ferrell of professional wrestling

"Backstage, the Will Ferrell of profressional wrestling is being silly with Sting. He wants to merge the world titles and be intergalactic world champion. HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!!!!! SOOOOOOOOOOO FUNNY!!!!! Sting asks if Eric saw what happened earlier. Eric said he was watching Who’s The Boss. HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! IT’S FUNNY BECAUSE WHO’S THE BOSS IS AN OLD SHOW!!!"
(June 9, 2011, Blair A. Douglas, Inside Pulse Wrestling)

The Danny McBride of central Europe

"This is a joke, right? This guy is the Danny McBride of central Europe, right? Right?"
(May 9, 2011, Videogum)

The Ron Swanson of friendships

"I can cut a person out of my life with great ease. I’m a great friend (if I don’t say so myself), I’m forgiving, and while we’re being honest I can be a complete asshole. If we can’t work out whats ailing this relationship, I become the Ron Swanson of friendships 'Slash it, Slash it' BOOM! you’re gone."
(July 7, 2011, The Surly Otter)

The topless Helen Mirren of writing credits

"To put it in terms we can all appreciate: this is the topless Helen Mirren of writing credits. Classy and wonderful."
(Robert Ben Garant & Thomas Lennon, Writing Movies for Fun and Profit, p. 124)

The Dirk Nowitzki of gerontology

"Off to keep typing and write those papers now...As the Mavs' unmatched leader Coach Carlisle said last night, the Mavs said all year that "it's not about what you can't do; it's about what you can do." So it's time for me to be the Dirk Nowitzki of gerontology. Have a Shiner for me Dallas!!!"
(June 13, 2011, Eric Moves to Israel)

The Venus Williams of sex

"The Mister and I managed to bump uglies 5 out of seven nights this week (you can read all about it here, here, and here). There was a time, back when we were first together, when I would have considered this a dry spell. Nowadays it makes me feel like some sort of sex champion. I’m like the Venus Williams of sex. Someone should give me a trophy. Instead I will celebrate my victory by bestowing upon you my hard won sex wisdom."
(Feb. 21, 2011, Samantha Schoech, BabyCenter)

The R. Kelly of Asgard

"Joshua Dallas on his character: 'Fandral would like to think of himself as the R. Kelly of Asgard. He’s a lover, not a fighter. You know what I’m saying? I’ve seen ‘Trapped in The Closet’ and ‘Keep it on the Down Low.’ All that kind of stuff.' Say what now?"
(May 5, 2011, Recording Live from Somewhere...)

The Rupert Murdoch of hamburgers

"In summary, this whole burger drama talking place between David (Milk Burger) and Goliath (Shake Shack) could prove profitable for one business here. Milk Burger just opened. They are not the Rupert Murdoch of hamburgers. I believe the owner. It was an honest mistake. He probably just looked at the material that was presented to him for sign off and quickly approved it. Now there is only one place to potentially go from here when you’re starting a business at the bottom…and that’s up!"
(July 20, 2011, HarlemGal Inc.)

The Jack White of beer

"I look at Stone Brew like the Jack White of beer – they simply can’t do wrong. Double Bastard actually raises their own standards and, my friend, I think they made the perfect beer."
(May 3, 2011, Hungry in Houston)