The Miles Davis of crying

"I am the Miles Davis of Crying

On Saturday, I sat down at a coffee shop to write an email to someone and ended up writing a story instead. 'It'll End in Tears' is a story on today's Morning News about this staggering news week and my staggering ability to process most everything through my tear ducts."
(Sept. 3, 2008, Sarah Hepola)

The Rosa Parks of marble memorial bus stops

"Have a seat … but not in the back! You are the Rosa Parks of marble memorial bus stops."

(Dec. 30, 2008, Wonkette)

The Jenna Jameson of chart patterns

"Since you are reading this blog online, the best way to explain it is that Island-reversal formations are the Jenna Jameson of chart patterns. And by that I mean the Jenna from 10 years ago, not the old-and-busted anorexic Jenna from now. Hope that gives ya some good perspective."
(Jan. 10, 2008, Troy Peterson, Peterson Cleaning)

The Sylvia Plath of scatological science fiction

"Brava, madam! Brava!

You are the Sylvia Plath of scatological science fiction! The Emily Bronte of le blagues sur le pénis, if you will.

I say again: Brava! Bravissimo!"
(Nov. 3, 2008, i fight robots)

The Little Richard of understatement

"Mark Knopfler is the Little Richard of understatement. Like Lucinda Williams, his singing sounds effortless, and spot on for every song. He does not overdo."
(Sept. 24, 2008, Southern Ledger)

The Stephen Hawking of the Smurf village

"Donkey Kong is just excited because he's never seen a wounded albino Smurf before. Dig Dug told him about one once, but Kong didn't believe him. He just chalked it up to Dig Dug's drinking.

Brainy (or Braineleh to his parents) has faced many challenges in life. Sure, being inside most of his life avoiding the sun's deadly rays has protected him from Gargamel, but at what price? Being the Stephen Hawking of the Smurf village may buy him prestige, but it doesn't buy happiness. He had this worked out in a mathematical theorem, but Kong ate it."
(May 8, 2008, Frank Talk)

The Mike Tyson of evangelical publishing

"Meanwhile, I don’t suppose I’m missing out on a lot of sales to readers of World, which I once described as 'an angry, fierce magazine with a hard-to-believe veneer of sweetness — the Mike Tyson of evangelical publishing.' But in the spirit of interfaith dialogue, I’ll nonetheless offer a few corrections in the same gentle spirit in which Marvin teases that I 'yearn for dominating power.' Hmm. Actually, that’s kind of kinky."
(Sept. 7, 2008, Bene Diction Blogs On)